- I'm not changed it’s just I grew up and you should try too.
- I never insult people I only tell them what they are.
- If you think I am BAD than you’re wrong, I'm the worst.
- The biggest slap to your enemies is your success.
- I always arrive late at office but I make it by leaving early.
- I’m sorry my fault. I forgot you’re an Idiot.
- I don’t have a bad handwriting, I have my own FONT.
- My attitude based on how you treat me.
- Hakuna Matata!!! – The great motto to live life...
- Yeah You - The one reading my status, Get Lost!
- When a bird hits your window have you ever wondered if God is playing angry birds with you?
- I know the voices in my head aren’t real but sometimes their ideas are just absolutely awesome!
- I loved a girl and she broke my heart. Now every piece of my heart love different girls. People called it flirt that's not fair…
- Dear Mario, I wasted my childhood trying to save your girlfriend. Now, you help me to save mine.
- Me and my wife live happily for 25 years and then we met…
- Childhood is like being drunk, everyone remembers what you did, except you.
- I’m poor. I can’t pay ATTATION in Class room.
- When I'm good I'm best , when I'm bad I'm worst.
- I’m cool but global warming made me hot.
- Excuse me. I found something under my shoes oh its your Attitude.
- If people are trying to bring you ‘Down’, It only means that you are ‘Above them’.
- Please don’t get confused between my personality & my attitude.
- My personality is who I am & my attitude depends on who you are!
- I'm Not Special , I'm Just Limited Edition.
- Everything that kills me makes me feel alive.
- I enjoy when people show Attitude to me because it shows that they need an Attitude to impress me!
- Stop checking my status ! Go get a Life!
- Coins always make sound but the currency notes are always silent! that’s why I’m always calm & silent.
- My “last seen at” was just to check your “last seen at”.
- Life is too short. Don't waste it removing pen drive safely.
- Life will give you exactly what you need, not what you want.
- I did lots of stupid things on social networking sites but atleast I never commented “Cute pic dear“ on girls profile picture.
- Your Whatsapp status say’s online …..If your online then why aren’t you texting me
- I started out with nothing and i still have most of it :)
- I was not busy to be online… I had just gave up on my life when I picked up this girls phone and saw my contact name as “Free Recharge”
- I will marry the girl who look as pretty as in her Aadhaar card
- They say we learn from our mistakes. So I'm making as many as possible! Soon I will be a genius.
- Sorry vegetarians we can’t pretend.
- Waiting for Wi-Fi network.
- I wish I had Google in my mind and antivirus in my heart.
- Life is too short. Don’t waste it reading my Whatsapp status...
- Tried to loose weight… But it keeps finding me.
- I just saved a bunch of money on my car insurance by selling my car.
- I’m looking for a bank loan which can perform two things..give me a Loan and then leave me Alone.
- lazy People Fact #5812672793 You were too lazy to read that number.
- Sleep till you’re hungry... Eat till you’re sleepy.
- If your bad. Call me your Dad.
- If I was asked what a friend looks like, I would seat next to you and hold you tight because you define what true friendship really is.
- Friends are the family you choose
- Good friends will share the umbrella. Best friends will steal it and yell: It’s Awesome, Now Run!
- What is a Best friend? A single soul in two bodies.
- Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: ‘What! You too? I thought I was the only one.
- A friend is someone who knows all about you and still loves you.
- True friendship is sitting together in silence and feeling like it was the best conversation you've ever had.
- Friends are notes to life's great songs. A melody that carries you along.
- A best friend is someone who tells you the truth even when you don't want to hear it.
- I don't have an attitude, I have standards for the people who are supposed to be my friends.
- It is better to live alone. There is no friendship with a fool.
- A true friend sees the first tear, catches the second an stops the third.
- A true friend reaches for your hand and touches your hear.
- That awesome moment when you're telling a lie and your best friend notices and joins you.
- My friends are the weirdest, most craziest people I know but I love them.
- World is full of smiles, whenever friends are with me.
- If friendship is your weakest point then your the strongest person in the world.
- Good friends are like starts. You don't always see them but you know they're always there.
- Fake friends believe in rumors. Real friends believe in you.
- Never forget who was there for you when no one else was.
- Every friendship doesn't change into love but every love begins with friendship.
- A beautiful friendship can change people.
- True friendship comes when silence between two people is comfortable.
- A good friend would bail you out of jail but your best friend would be the one sitting next to you saying, damn that was cool.
- A true friend is someone who never gets tried of listening to your pointless dramas over and over again.
- Relation of friendship is greater then the relation of blood.
- A friend is someone who can see the truth and pain in you even when you are fooling everyone else.
- A day spend with friends is always a day well spend.
- Good friends are hard to find, difficult to leave, impossible to forget.
- I’ve been using Google for 10 years and I have no idea who uses the “I’m Feeling Lucky” button
- Everyone has an annoying friend. If you don’t have one, it’s probably you.
- I love to walk in fog, because nobody knows I'm smoking.
- I'm not drunk, I'm just chemically off-balanced.
- Oh, so you wanna argue, bring it. I got my CAPS LOCK ON.
- I'm so poor that I can't pay attention in class.
- Warning!!! I know KARATE and few other oriental words.
- I'm not virgin, my life fucks me everyday.
- I talk to myself because I like dealing with a better class of people.
- Save water drink beer.
- Virginity is not dignity, It is just lack of opportunity.
- Not all men are fools, some stay bachelor.
- Phones are better than girlfriends, at least we can switch off.
- I love my job only when I'm on vacation
- Friends come and go, but enemies remain and build up.
- Behind every successful man is a surprised woman.
- In my house I'm the boss, my wife is just the decision maker.
- How is a poor man a lot like a rich man? they both have an iPhone.
- Some people call me Mike, you can call me tonight.
- Sometimes you succeed and other times you learn.
- I always dream of being a millionaire like my uncle... He's dreaming too.
- Scratch here ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒ to reveal my status.
- Not always "Available".. try your Luck..
- Time is precious, waste it wisely.
